so Im trying to open a jar of pickles and I tell my mom ‘ugh this is why I need a strong man in my life’ and hand it to her. She opens it in one try, and I say ‘or maybe just a strong mom??’. Then she hands me the pickle jar, looks me dead in the eye and says ‘All you need is a strong YOU in your life’ and Im pretty sure it was the most inspirational thing she has ever said to me ever.
so I’m driving in the parking deck and I see a group of really hot boys walking to a car and for a second I forgot that my window is open and I scream to myself “JESUS CHRIST WHY IS EVERYONE ON THIS CAMPUS SO HOT” and it is only then that I realize that I said it out loud because I hear the echo on the parking deck walls.
and for second they stop and stare at me and I stare at them and I then I just drove off with the blankest expression I could manage.
WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
the emotional trauma we all collectively experienced in grade school in response to ‘flowers for algernon’
about 1 in every 100 people can be classified as a psychopath. You may have met the next Ted Bundy or John Wayne Gacy Jr and not even know it.
So be nice to your neighbors. (✿◠‿◠)